To Tell, or Not To Tell? When Friends Break Rules

Jonah is a rising college senior during the COVID-19 pandemic. Although remote learning procedures were implemented, the college eventually decided to allow only the senior class back to campus for their final year. This decision came with strict health and safety protocols. Jonah was concerned about the potential risk of returning but was reassured by his friends that they all intended to be safe. Unfortunately, “safe” had different connotations for his friends than for Jonah. Soon after returning to campus, Jonah witnessed his friends flaunting the college’s guidelines. Jonah began to pull away from his friends, whose behavior he saw as increasingly negligent. Concerned for his own health as well as the safety of others in the community, Jonah felt torn about whether to report his friends’ behavior to the school or maintain his loyalty by keeping quiet.


Jonah is a rising college senior. Over the summer, due to the COVID-19 pandemic, Jonah’s college announced that classes were moving online for the entirety of Jonah’s senior year. When remote learning was announced, Jonah and his friends were disappointed that they would not get to experience the senior year they had envisioned for themselves. They come from different parts of the country, and their senior year was their last chance to be together as a group. Many students in similar circumstances complained to the college, and after much deliberation, the administration announced that seniors would be allowed to come to campus for their final year. The school also announced that strict COVID-19 regulations would be put in place for the entire campus community. Any breach of the rules would result in students being asked to leave campus.

After the announcement, Jonah and his friends decided to take the opportunity to return to campus for their final year. Jonah was apprehensive about returning, having been very careful since initial lockdown measures were announced, but his friends convinced him that it was the best decision and perfectly safe. Jonah’s friends assured him that he had nothing to worry about, especially since their school had established measures to prevent and discourage large social gatherings. 

Soon after Jonah and his friends returned to campus, Jonah realized that his friends’ understanding of “careful” was different from his own. His friends often gathered inside of one another’s dorm rooms without masks, despite the university’s explicit rules prohibiting them from doing so. Although he was always invited, Jonah always declined, not wanting to put himself at risk. After a few weeks, Jonah decided to talk to his friends, some of whom were also his roommates, about his concerns, explaining that their actions made him feel unsafe. He mentioned that school policies did not allow visits to people in different dorms without a mask or a negative COVID-19 test. Instead of being understanding, his friends told him that he was paranoid and that he ought to “loosen up.” His friends didn’t seem to feel threatened by the virus or feel it was necessary to strictly adhere to their college’s policies. 

After this unsuccessful conversation, Jonah’s friends stopped inviting him to things. Soon afterwards, Jonah noticed that his friends were becoming even more reckless, going to larger gatherings and parties. Jonah felt frustrated. Compared to smaller dorm room groups, campus parties were a much larger infraction. 

Jonah feels betrayed by his friends. Especially as he shares living space with some of the individuals involved, he is upset that he has been put in a situation where he feels unsafe. Jonah is convinced that if he broaches the topic again, they would laugh it off and tell him that he was being unreasonable. Ultimately, Jonah feels like the safest and most responsible thing to do is to anonymously report them to the school administration. He believes that by reporting them anonymously, his friends wouldn’t blame him, and Jonah would be protecting himself, his friends, and the college community from the virus. Nonetheless, Jonah is hesitant to file a report: since this is the group’s senior year, he doesn’t want his friends to be sent home and he doesn’t want to ruin their senior year.


What would you do if you were Jonah? Are there alternative options he hasn’t considered? What does Jonah owe to his friends in this situation, if anything? What does Jonah owe to his college community in this situation, if anything?